WWE BASH IN BERLIN
AUGUST 31, 2024
UBER ARENA
BERLIN, GERMANY
Watch: Peacock/WWE Network (Non-US)
Show Preview: https://www.voicesofwrestling.com/2024/08/27/wwe-bash-in-berlin-2024-august-31-preview-predictions/
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WWE’s summer abroad comes to an end in Deutschland, as the fallout of SummerSlam leads right into Bash In Berlin!
WWE UNIVERSAL TITLE MATCH
CODY RHODES (C) DEF. KEVIN OWENS
I’m going to sound like a jerk here, but I’ve had my fill of these European WWE crowds. I’m not a stranger to European crowds, as I reviewed PROGRESS Wrestling in the UK during its heyday. But the opening portion of this match saw this crowd be more excited to create an atmosphere for the show than actually reacting to what’s happening. More power to them, as they’re in the building and paid to have a good time, but there’s a difference between a crowd being genuinely hot and a crowd trying to make a hot atmosphere. It feels artificial, which is a feeling I have with this promotion in general.
Now, these two went on to earn the reaction and had the best title match of Rhodes’ reign so far. It was a simple match, with Owens targeting the ribs of Rhodes after hitting a frog splash off the apron. We had our “story” spot come up here, as Rhodes hurt his knee going up for a double-jump Cody Cutter. Owens revealed on Smackdown that Rhodes had hurt the knee on the preceding European tour and didn’t want to beat a compromised champion, but Rhodes fobbed it off as nothing.
Owens saw Rhodes hurt and didn’t go after the knee initially, but after Rhodes shouted that he was ok, Owens booted him in the knee. He set up the apron powerbomb but instead chose to roll Rhodes back into the ring instead. They went back and forth for a few minutes before Rhodes got his knees up on a swanton attempt and hit the Cross Rhodes for the win.
I watched this show spoiled, so I knew this spot was coming. While it wasn’t as egregious as you would see in NXT or in the recent Will Ospreay storyline in AEW, I still have a fundamental disagreement with the idea of wrestlers not wanting to be TOO violent. This is a contact sport where people are paid to fight each other. We as fans know that and sign up for it. To have a wrestler not want to do what it takes to win the fight – in a non-cheating capacity – goes against what I want out of my wrestling. I want unapologetic violence, not moral dilemmas about wrestling moves. Again though, the spot itself wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be, and the match as a whole was a quality opener. This was the best WWE main roster PPV match I’ve seen in months.
Owens and Rhodes shook hands after the match, keeping both men as babyfaces for the time being. ***3/4
WWE WOMEN’S TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH
BIANCA BELAIR & JADE CARGILL DEF. THE UNHOLY UNION (ALBA FYRE & ISLA DAWN) (C)
Alba Fyre and Isla Dawn’s tag title reign, only given to them as a token win for the Scotland crowd that they were going to piss on an hour later, predictably ended here as Belair and Cargill regained the titles. This was a fine match, with Cargill pulling Belair out of the way of a senton leading to Belair and Cargill hitting their tag move to win. Wait a minute, wasn’t that the finish to the opener?
Cargill looked good here in her capacity. Her hot tag helped her to look as well as she could. As much as people want Jade to be a huge singles star, this may be her position of best use. She’s been a limited singles wrestler for her entire career, mostly due to none of her employers giving her a ton of reps. Being in a tag team allows her to look good while letting someone else carry the load. While I would have Bianca Belair in a much bigger role than this, she’s good in this one. ***1/4
STRAP MATCH
CM PUNK DEF. DREW MCINTYRE
These two started off at a disadvantage from jump street. You can read my parts of the SummerSlam review to see my issues with the storyline, but my bigger issue was WWE finding another cumbersome stipulation to saddle on these two, replacing an attention-grabbing referee with big lights and a leather strap.
The concept of the “touch all four corners” strap match makes sense to me, as it’s supposed to show one man taking a dominant and literal victory lap over his beaten opponent. But it never ends up that way, at least in this company. It becomes a cartoonish race to see who can hit all four corners, with the Bugs Bunny “babyface secretly taps all the corners behind the heel’s back” finish teased every single time. Add giant red and green lights to the corners to make sure the dumb fans can keep up, and these two had an uphill climb.
The good news is that this was better than the SummerSlam match. It would’ve been a real accomplishment to be worse, but hey, low bars still need to be cleared. They fought with the intensity and the hate that you would want, with both men forgoing chances to hit the buckles to get more shots with the strap in. Punk did get a bit bloody in the body of the match before McIntyre dumped him through a table on the floor. There was a kernel of the match I wanted these two to have, but it was still hampered by the stipulation. The infamous bracelet made an appearance, but Punk laid McIntyre out with three consecutive Go To Sleeps before taking the bracelet and winning the match in a very definitive finish.
If I had written this review on the day, I’d be wondering if this was the blowoff. But after McIntyre jumped Punk on Raw and broke the bracelet, this feud must continue. Side note: I never want to write the word “bracelet” in a review on this site ever again. ***
There was an in-ring announcement that Bash in Berlin was the highest-grossing arena show in WWE history. The fans cheered WWE milking them like cows.
MIXED TAG TEAM MATCH
THE TERROR TWINS (DAMIAN PRIEST & RHEA RIPLEY) DEF. THE JUDGMENT DAY (DOMINIK MYSTERIO & LIV MORGAN)
Speaking of uphill climbs, there was never a world where I would be head over heels for this match. I have a negative emotional investment in this storyline, as I don’t care about Rhea Ripley getting her heat back on Dom and Liv. This was just Priest and Ripley pinballing these dorks around for way too long. This was fifteen minutes, and I would’ve believed you if you told me it was twenty-five. The rest of the Judgment Day got involved to give Dominik a close nearfall, but Rhea pinned Liv with the Riptide. Firmly Not For Me. *1/2
WWE WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE MATCH
GUNTHER (C) DEF. RANDY ORTON
Jesse Collings wrote a column about Randy Orton after watching this match, and I would strongly recommend reading it as it echoes a lot of issues I have with Orton as well. I’m largely agnostic on Randy Orton, but I have never once considered him a great wrestler. He’s a wrestler with great fundamentals, but never does he try to expand beyond the Randy Orton formula. He does his thing, I slap ***1/2 on it, we all move on. But the reaction to Jesse’s column made me examine Orton a bit further.
Many of the disagreements with Jesse’s column immediately accuse him of not respecting Orton’s style and only being interested in FLIPZ, a sign of ignorance and insecurity from those throwing that particular barb. Other dissenting opinions brought up what Orton does well, which boiled down to the typical chatter about his look and his fundamentals. Those points raised a question in my head that I want to raise here: When do the fundamentals stop being impressive? Randy Orton has been wrestling since the year 2000. He’s largely been in the same shape and has been fundamentally sound since his call-up to the WWE main roster in 2002. At some point, shouldn’t someone with that rock-solid base work on developing beyond that base into something more?
To make a cross-sport comparison, Randy Orton reminds me of NFL quarterback Sam Darnold. Sports pundits would swear up and down that Darnold had great measurables and intangible qualities that would make him a great quarterback coming out of college. However, Darnold has been a complete bust, flaming out of the New York Jets starting role and bouncing around the league ever since. Yet, despite being on four teams in seven years, there are still people who will claim that Darnold could thrive in the right circumstances.
I wouldn’t call Randy Orton a bust by any means, as he’s been a generally reliable main event name for the company for over a decade. But when people tell me that Orton could be great when the situation arose, I have to wonder if that’s true. The man has main-evented Wrestlemania, been in major angles, and has been a 14-time World Champion. And the complaints have always been the same. So, is Orton a Kevin Nash-esque, laissez-faire worker that simply doesn’t have the drive to be better? Or is he someone who mastered the WWE style, and simply has the shortcomings that go along with that?
It doesn’t matter to anyone other than this circle of fans. Orton’s just signed another multi-year, undoubtedly multi-million-dollar contract with this company, setting him up well for the rest of his life. He doesn’t need to care about mine or Jesse’s opinion of him, and I hope he has better things to do than to care about what I think of his work. But that doesn’t mean that I have to see him as the all-time great that WWE promotes him to be.
Oh yeah, there was a match that happened here.
The crowd got into themselves early on here, doing the wave as these two tried to wait it out. Orton worked on Gunther’s dominant arm to mitigate the chops and the powerbomb. None of Gunther’s chops had the pop that I’m used to hearing, which I think was a sound issue. The strap match didn’t have any loud strap shots either, which was a bit deflating.
After a long struggle, Gunther got a big powerbomb for a nearfall. Gunther went for another powerbomb, but Orton caught him with an RKO for a nearfall. The match slowed to an absolute crawl here, as Orton spent at least five minutes setting up and executing a side suplex through the announce table. There was one point where Gunther was down and Orton just sat on the stairs to catch his breath. I get letting spots breathe, but this was egregious.
Orton went for another RKO, but Gunther caught him in a sleeper hold. Orton fought his way free using the bad arm, but Gunther chopped him in the neck and re-applied the sleeper. Orton fell onto his back to break it again, but Gunther sat up and snatched another sleeper to eventually choke Orton out.
I’m sure there were plenty of backpats from the numerous agents in the back for this one, but my god this match was dull. The throughline was simple and smart, with Orton taking away a ton of Gunther’s offense by targeting one of his limbs and Gunther fighting through the pain to get the definitive win he didn’t get in their first match. But this was way too long, with nowhere near enough energy from the wrestlers to carry it through. **1/2
