WWE Survivor Series 2014
November 23, 2014

Alicia Fox, Emma, Naomi and Natalya vs. Paige, Cameron, Layla and Summer Rae

Rich Kraetsch: This has the potential to be a surprisingly great match or an absolute trainwreck and it depends solely on time. If this match is given a serious amount of time and Fox, Emma, Natalya and Paige get most of the time, it could be good. But, c’mon, that’s not happening. I expect this to be around 8 minutes and be a total clusterfuck filled with awful finishes and typical WWE divas madness.

Prediction: Team Paige

Sean Flynn: It looks like this match was added simply to prove Rich’s point about how awful traditional Survivor Series matches are. I mean, it’s not like it has to be bad, as at least ½ of the people involved are quite capable of putting on a decent to great match. In the best possible world this goes 25 minutes, Paige/Summer, Emma, and Nattie get most of the ring time, and we get a surprisingly good start to the match. In our world it goes 9 minutes with Jerry Lawler spending the entire time killing anyone playing a drinking game with a shot for every time he says “crazy”.

Prediction: Team Paige

Rob McCarron: In what will obviously be the best match on the card, eight adventurous WWE divas will square off for a prize more valuable than any of the women have previously had the chance to obtain — a victory at the 2014 Survivor Series. Four women will claim victory, while the other four will have their career sidetracked in a way that many will feel is unrecoverable. Paige is breaking down mentally after losing her Divas title, and her recent foe Alicia Fox is waiting in the wings to capitalize. Natalya is getting the chance to lead a team into battle, instead of Rosa into a locker room. Will she take advantage of the opportunity, or will we get a stunner like Cameron eliminating all four of her opponents in a clean sweep? It’s the greatest night in the history of our great sport, and a match worthy of a career performance by the members of Team Natalya.

Prediction: Team Natalya

WWE Tag Team Championship
Gold and Stardust © vs. The Usos vs.Los Matadores vs. The Miz & Damien Mizdow 

Rich Kraetsch: I’m really looking forward to this match, at least relative to the rest of this card. This could and will probably steal the show. Even better, I don’t have a clue who wins here. You can make a reasonable argument for everyone in this match winning the belts with the lone exception being the Matadores. My likely guess it he Miz and Mizdow with some amount of comedy, but I still like for this to be a great match.

Prediction: The Miz & Damien Mizdow

Sean Flynn: At some point the Mizdow story has to actually lead somewhere, right? I don’t think we’re to the point where The Big Thing, whatever that might be, happens. But there has to be some advancement here. There’s really no better way to move this thing along than to give Mizdow the belts due to Sandow doing something to win. I suppose Miz costing them a win because he doesn’t want Sandow getting the belts would suffice also. But I’m feeling a title change. Also I bet the Usos jump over the top rope onto someone.

Prediction: The Miz & Damien Mizdow 

Rob McCarron: In what will obviously be the best match on the card, eight adventurous WWE Superstars will square off to gain recognition as the best tag team in WWE. Los Matadores have come out of nowhere lately, but it isn’t quite their time to do much more than be a throw in team. The Usos held gold much of the year, but what have they done since losing them? The answer: Lose more. Gold & Stardust are coming off a steel cage win over those Usos, while The Miz’ are coming off a pet cage loss under Grumpy Cat. Who has the momentum? Tough to say. What I can say, however, is this match will likely steal the show on the greatest night in the history of our great sport.

Prediction: The Miz & Damien Mizdow

Bray Wyatt vs. Dean Ambrose 

Rich Kraetsch: WWE has done a masterful job of making sure Dean Ambrose isn’t 2015’s Daniel Bryan by booking him in a completely non-sense angle with the heat vacuum himself Bray Wyatt. Look, I let the Wyatt thing play out longer than most on this website but I’m pretty over it now. What’s more, I’m really not liking the idea that Dean Ambrose is living in his fantasy world and we have to bring up Ambrose’s bad childhood or something stupid. He’s such an organically likable character who doesn’t need this crazy backstory to get over. Whatever… the match itself should be pretty good but I have no interest in this match overall.

Prediction: Bray Wyatt

Sean Flynn: This is pretty much the only story on the show that has my attention. Can the damaged beyond repair Wyatt find a way to overcome his fears and tell Dean Ambrose just how much he loves him? Can he turn violence into affection? Could we see the return of Dr. Shelby taking Bray and Dean into Anger Management classes? The match is just window dressing. It will be fine of course as both guys will go hard and likely have lots of props to play with and go all over the place. For months the rumor has been that The Ascension is coming up to be Bray’s new followers, and this would be as good a time as any I suppose. Either way I think Bray needs the win more than Ambrose.

Prediction: Bray Wyatt. Maybe with friends. Maybe with the power of love. 

Rob McCarron: In what will obviously be the best match on the card, two straight up psychopaths collide in an epic battle to see who can claim the title of most off-his-rocker star in WWE. Dean Ambrose failed to get revenge on Seth Rollins, but that fact didn’t stop him from focusing fully on Bray Wyatt now. As Dean’s gimmick is set to be cemented as a guy who loses a lot more than you realize, I wonder just how many more props he’ll pull out on his way to being the undercard match at WrestleMania against Luke Harper. Speaking of… Bray Wyatt released the two followers under his control, and they end up in the main event. Seems like a dumb move, Bray. It’ll be okay, however, as Bray will rise up to the challenge of taking out the Lunatic Fringe on the greatest night in the history of our great sport.

Prediction: Bray Wyatt

WWE Divas Championship
AJ Lee vs. Nikki Bella

Rich Kraetsch: This is the conclusion of the Bellas’ thrilling 30-day angle where Brie was forced to be Nikki’s assistant. I can’t even come up with my favorite moment of the angle because there was so many: a smoothie being poured on Brie, uh….that…um…you remember…. well you get the point. I see the big conclusion being Brie somehow costing AJ the title (not on purpose) and Nikki becoming your new champion. Or Brie was in on it all along ala “The Higher Power” and the new boom period kicks off.

Prediction: Nikki Bella

Sean Flynn: It is my lot in life to predict each time that AJ Lee is on her way out the door. One of these days I’m going to be right. Time for Mrs. Brooks to head back to Wicker Park and spend her days reading comics and taking Colt Cabana out for his nightly walk. And for us to get MOAR BELLAS! *sob*

Prediction: Nikki Bella

Rob McCarron: In what will obviously be the best match on the card, AJ Lee is fighting not just for her name, pride, and legacy – but also her Divas Championship. Nikki Bella is fighting not just for her name, pride, and boobies – but also to win the Divas Championship. Before her sister can, I may add. This is a sibling rivalry between Nikki and Brie, and it will continue on after this match with AJ out of the picture. That’s right, the greatest night in the history of our great sport is the launching pad for Brie vs Nikki for the Divas Title!

Prediction: Nikki Bella

Team Cena (John Cena, Dolph Ziggler, Big Show, Erick Rowan and Ryback) vs. Team Authority (Seth Rollins, Kane, Luke Harper, Rusev and Mark Henry)

Rich Kraetsch: Could I possibly care less about stipulations than what we’re getting with this match? I mean seriously, I’d love to know ANYONE in the world who believes that Team Cena (sans Cena) will be fired if they lose. People believe The Authority may lose their power for a short period of time but this company can’t help itself. Plus, Stephanie and HHH are pretty great in the role, so they’ll likely be back to it as soon as possible (look for a “control the company” match at Rumble or Mania). Regardless of my thoughts on the stip, I’m excited about the match, how it’s laid out and who stands out. My eyes will particularly be set on Dolph Ziggler, Ryback, Luke Harper and Rusev. This Survivor Series match could be a great place to kickstart a number of feuds for those guys and really build them up as a few new sub-stars in a company dying for ANYONE new on top. The finish will be something screwy and Cena will feel guilty on Raw that his entire team got fired. The internet will explode with instance #4,501 of people saying “THIS IS A GOOD TIME TO TURN CENA HEEL” Vince or someone will bring the dudes back later in the show and we’ll be back to square one.

Prediction: Team Authority

Sean Flynn: Well, any intrigue I had about this match went down the crapper with the addition of the Team Cena gets fired stip. If they’re going to have an authority figure, having a face one leading into Mania season isn’t a bad idea. Gives a good storyline reason for creating crowd-pleasing matches/angles for Rumble and Mania. Teddy Long is already planning out tag matches in his head just in case he gets the call. We’re going crazy here, and trying to predict each fall. Rusev submits Ziggler. Ryback pins Kane. Big Show and Rusev double countout. Rollins pins Rowan. Ryback eliminates Henry. Henry, Kane, Noble, Mercury, etc. attack Ryback causing him to be carried off. Cena eliminates Harper. Authority attacks Cena en masse. Team Cena runs in. Cena left in ring with HHH, Rollins, Kane. Roman Reigns returns, clears ring, gets Rollins into position for AA.

Prediction: #LOLCENAWINS 

Rob McCarron: In what will obviously be the best match on the card, ten (COUNT ‘EM, TEN!) men from all walks of life will tear the house down to determine who stays and who goes. This match is so important to Triple H that he isn’t even going to participate in it. This match is so important to John Cena that he hasn’t even participated in the build up. Against my better judgment, I’m going with the dark horses on this one. Or is it the black hats? Team Cena will lose, and all four of his team members will get fired. Then, gradually, we’ll see wacky ways for them to get their jobs back. Or better, yet, the Authority doesn’t even enforce the stip, instead deciding to keep them under control and make their lives miserable. Either way, Triple H & Stephanie McMahon will retain control of WWE as their group of lesser dorks reigns supreme to end the greatest night in the history of our great sport.

Prediction: Team Authoritah!