WWE Main Event
October 14, 2014
The road to WWE Hell In A Cell leads right through WWE Main Event (it does?), so I’m back to give you all the dirt on the chaos that’s been happening on Main Event over the last two weeks (chaos, huh?)! John Cena, Randy Orton, Seth Rollins, and Deam Ambrose are all anxiously awaiting their main event matches on Sunday, so what did the four have in store for Main Event viewers? Well, aside from Rollins, nothing. Because, you see, Main Event really doesn’t matter in storylines. It’s a show with fun matches… sometimes. That’s all this show is now. After a brief period of importance when the show first became exclusive to WWE Network, Main Event really has just become exactly like Superstars. It’s a show with fun matches, occasionally having something to do with angles on Raw and Smackdown. So what do we have this week? Let’s get right into it!
The Miz Calls Out Sheamien Sandow: The Miz opened the show this week to try really hard at embarrassing Sheamus. His plan was to call out Sheamus, but instead, Damien Sandow walked out dressed in full body white leotard, with a red wig and his beard colored red. Sandow spoke in an unbelievably non-Irish Irish accent. He sang Sheamus’ entrance, complete with “lobster head” reference, which Cole laughed at on commentary. Sandow was again the show stealer here, and Miz just soaked up all of Sandow’s compliments with the douchey smirk on his face. Eventually, the real Sheamus made his way to the ring to speak truths to Miz. Sandow continued the ruse of playing Sheamus, copying Sheamus’ actions in the ring to somewhat comical results. It wouldn’t last, however, as Sheamus took out Sandow with a clothesline before Miz bailed the ring. Sandow slowly got up before eating a Brogue Kick to be put down for good, with Miz looking on wondering if that might happen to him at Hell In A Cell.
Tyson Kidd vs R-Truth: Truth won via pinfall after a Little Jimmy. Tyson was still rocking the Beats headphones, and now, he has pictures of cats on his ring gear. He spoke before the match, telling us that there are two things in the world that will never lie: Cats and Facts. Fact is, Tyson wears the pants in the family and he’ll prove it tonight. OR NOT. Tyson lost a relatively quick, nothing match to Truth, who I almost forgot existed, after a little bit of a distraction from Natalya. Nattie was up on the ring apron as Tyson went for a Sharpshooter, but Truth got out and sent Tyson into his wife before nailing his finisher. Cole tried to sell that Nattie was actually trying to help Tyson, as he has begged for weeks for her to do, but it backfired. This was so much better on NXT. *1/2
Cesaro vs Justin Gabriel: Cesaro wins with a Neutralizer in about five minutes. Again, a good match, but pretty quick and not a whole lot to it. They were really selling Cesaro as a top contender to the IC title, although hasn’t he been for two years despite winning and losing it and never really getting on track. Really, everyone in WWE is an IC and US title contender because you don’t have to win matches to get title shots. You just have to be there. Really, that’s the only criteria of title shots these days. Just be on the roster. Poor JTG. **
Big E vs Rusev: Rusev won with the Accolade. Before the match, Lana compared America to an animal. New York would be the head, Los Angeles would be the tail, and the unshaved armpit would be Birmingham, Alabama. Clever. More clever, and hilarious, was Rusev then chiming in that Big Show would be the “stinking anus.” He was so proud of that line, pausing to smile and take in the crowd reaction. He then said Big Show would be speaking through his anus after Rusev got done with him. Rusev promos are BUYS! Big E’s music cut him off, and the two had a match. Oh, and what a match it was. These two guys gel like so few youngsters do. Now, it wasn’t a great match, but at no point did it drag and the twelve minutes this lasted actually went by quickly, even with a commercial break spliced in the middle. That’s a plus for me. The crowd seemed to really like it, too, and Rusev is a guy that gets general crowd reactions not just from his promos, but his matches as well. He’s going to be something, no matter what some people who chant the “he’s a one note gimmick” line want you to believe. ***
WWE Main Event
October 21, 2014
The final live show before WWE Hell In A Cell on Sunday! I’m actually glad Main Event doesn’t matter too much to WWE higher ups, because after the wacky nonsensical build on Raw on Monday, a show featuring only mid card matches might be a step up.
But then, this happened…
Known Your Bro w/ JBL: So, Michael Cole opened the show cutting right to JBL in the ring, whom Cole referred to as ‘Montee Ball’ as he was set to host this game show which was supposed to build to the tag title match at Hell In A Cell. JBL gave this impassioned monologue complete with a Billy Gunn burialbefore getting the game going. They played this like Love Connection.
To Jimmy Uso: Who would your brother be if he was not a WWE Superstar? Answer: A football player. WE GOT A MATCH! The Usos take a quick lead. JBL mocked the answer as not being very creative. So far, JBL has buried both Billy Gunn and the Usos.
To Stardust: The same question. Stardust said Goldust would be… Stardust. That was CORRECT! Yep, Goldust guessed Stardust. Now that is knowing your brother. 1-1
To Jey Uso: Who is the biggest influence in Jimmy’s life? Jey answered Rikishi, and that was correct. The Usos then danced with JBL to Rikishi’s theme as they take a 2-1 lead.
To Goldust: Same question, who is Stardust’s biggest influence? Goldust’s answer: Yo. Michael Cole asked if this could get any worse. JBL wanted Goldust to think harder, as ‘yo’ isn’t a real answer. Of course, Stardust’s answer was indeed YO. 2-2
I can’t believe this was happening. Michael Cole called JBL “Wink MARKindale.” JBL then changed the game to Password, as he wondered how Jonathan Coachman didn’t get stuck doing this.
The first clue for the Usos was ‘Nasty’, and the brothers were able to complete it to take a 3-2 lead. Then, for the Dusts, their word was ‘milkshake.’ Stardust spoke normally, as Cody, to try and get Goldust to guess it. His final clue was “It brings all the boys to the yard,” to which Goldust guessed “your anus.” Wait, no, “Uranus,” he explained. That was wrong, and the Usos won. Oddly enough, this segment didn’t break out into a full blown brawl, but rather a mild one. The Usos celebrated their victory, then superkicked the Dusts out of the ring as this painful segment finally ended.
OMG, Tyson vs Truth in THE REMATCH!
Tyson Kidd vs R-Truth: Tyson Kidd wins!!!! Tyson was wearing the same red, cat photo laden gear from last week’s Main Event. Much like last week, also, Nattie played into the finish. Tyson was selling a tweaked knee, so Nattie jumped onto the apron to check on him. As Truth went to grab Tyson up, Kidd pulled him towards the ropes and almost into Nattie. Truth tried to avoid Nattie, so he stopped and checked on her. This distraction allowed Kidd to get up, no longer selling the knee, and land his spinning fisherman buster for the pinfall victory. Could Natalya finally be willing to help Tyson win via nefarious means!? Not so much a match as a quick means to further the story of Tyson & Nattie. *1/2
Another Wyatt freeing the followers video aired. Who could Bray’s new protectors be!? Whoever it is… it’s coming!
Bo Dallas vs Big E: Big E won win a Big Ending after Bo attempted his Bo-Dog. Big E’s power got the people into this match. Cole called Bo an inspirational figure who was growing his following, but Big E put a stop to Bo’s winning ways with the Big Ending after a very solid match. The two went back and forth, and Bo put in some good offense, but this was a Bo showcase when all was said and done. I liked this one more than I probably should, but Big E has had a good week in WWE this week. ***
To give the final push to Hell In A Cell, we were graced by a Seth Rollins main event this week on Main Event. Before the match, though, we got a lengthy hype video for the PPV, as well as a recap of Mick Foley’s return this week on Raw.
Seth Rollins vs Jack Swagger: Seth Rollins won via pinfall after the curbstomp. Jamie Noble & Joey Mercury accompanied Seth Rollins to the ring, as Zeb Colter did with Swagger. Cole continued to try and start “Undisputed Future” as a nickname for Seth Rollins, which Rollins mentioned on Raw. So that may be a thing still. The match was good. Slowly paced early as they were given some time, but it picked up later with Swagger getting the Patriot Lock and a nearfall from a Swagger bomb to give the crowd hope that Rollins could suffer defeat. Swagger had no hope, of course, especially with Noble and Mercury out there. As Swagger still had momentum, the two bodyguards for Rollins surrounded Zeb Colter at ringside. Swagger became concerned, telling them to get back, and the lack of focus lead to his downfall. Rollins took advantage, nailing with a knee to Swagger’s head before getting the win with his curbstomp. ***1/4
The last two matches on Episode 108 were worth the two hours, as they were solid and both told two stories. One, Big E is on the rebound trail. Will that actually continue past this episode? Who knows. Rollins was able to win his match with slight help from his goons, continuing the trend of Rollins barely escaping trouble only to thrive. The wrestling wasn’t great, but it was solid and good enough to give Episode 108, despite that shitty opening game show segment, a THUMBS UP! Episode 107, however, was completely skippable unless you want to see another Big E-Rusev match which, while good, didn’t mean anything.